smokin deans
dying hair
ninques porch
russet eyes
damn this die smells wrong.

I didn't think or fathom this happening.
Honestly i was the chasie, not you. You fell hard.So i thought.So you lied.
It kinds of reigns a small bullshit morsel of irony I have to admit. Good one, super hilarious. I get it.
I wasn't supposed to know, I'm never supposed to find out about these things. These stray bullets that bounce around in that
flamed head of yours.

I lurked your shit like I always do. Way to not erase the admitted love for another bitch. Hollerrr.
I feel dirty. Wasted. And used. 
You love me i don't doubt that, it's just inevitable.
What kills me is the last three days, how happy, the i miss you alreadys and I love yous that now,  fall so completely short.
Way to come to realize if the butch haired pig claimed to require you in any sort of way you're willing to drop me like a hotcake and just
comply.
You make me really fucking sick.

Why can I just not care and say fuck you for not seeing how much I care?
Fuck you for stealing me to only abuse my feelings for you and desire the unattainable
You must just be addicted to hurt. Addicted to people who make you fight for a moot point. I apologize for being a good person.

I don't. I'm not sorry. You cry like you really want whats in front of you for once.
Again, good one.
For once I will not fear the break of a habit enough to keep it until it rots and decays.
You're a habit better off broken.
That's what i meant to say, what I mean to do.
So goodbye, too bad you're Stevie Wonder when it comes to feelings and love.
Too bad and goodbye.
 

My mind, it kind of goes fast. I can never find a better man, so i settle. I am disgusted at the way I completely understand my faults yet repeatedly ignore and re-do them,.,,; with a calm mind at that. The disgust must be short lived though because i'll be back on the anti track soon enough. I'll not complain about Jonny Craig and his fan fucking tastic vocal storage center. That's something I count on to be right and well. I don't know about things lately. I thought i was over it all but perhaps not. Quite Pathetic. He's so over, it only not. I can tell but he cannot. I should be without them all, seriously bro. I just do with what i get dealt and it really isn't enough to quench my various thirsts. I'm kind of stagnant where i'm at. It's okay, always is just ok. Not great or horrible. I'd rather it be that.

Last week was pretty fun, We had a storm and half days and finals and stuff. I spent the night at Henrys once cuz of the stom. We were supposed to go hangout with Morgan too and watch fearless but that plan got smashed. Uhmm so me and Hendle played tetris and stuff and watched movies until like 4:40 no lyin. I did okay on my finals. Me and Gabscout went to the techno rave and it was suhhh fun! Me her and H.Dexta i gottup on the speaka box and raved but got pulled down. Also people just are gross and dance liek faggot sluttfucks. I liek moving to music in a happy way not an airsex fashion. SOO dumb, to me. I spent the night there two nights and it was good and fun. Then I went to memes and got my bracie things ttoday and they hurt like a muthafucker. But i wanna get um off soon. Plus i get to go to school and start my new classes tomorrow. And see people i haven't seen for awhile, people. person people.    !


ok meme bye

Jergan, i'm actually listening to some panic! at the disc jockey at the momento, aside from my former ganst jamz prior. I honestly believe that listening to a certain kind of musica can alter your personality. Probably an already explored concept but it's so clear when i experience it. It's real odd. Pretty Odd. I got back today from Hayle Stoms house, we watched movies slash bravo for the whole while aka 2 days. it was divine. Im always so comfy there though there was feuding going downn. Thats another eason i think we get along cuz we have semi similar families. But not at the same time. I want Edward Cullen. Reminding me of my super crushin ive been doing. AH he is soo attractive and smart and well dressed and thought, Gosh darnnnit. Aw the day met the night, such a great song. I want to do this ripple dipple thing with Hayley and Keyna the adventure, id have to sing eeey boy id be so nervy about that. It would be great i think ill sing in front of a library crowd first to get the initial nervz outtta the way. Im outta here though, sorry it's been ages.